Mean Mustard

Est. In Grandma's Kitchen

Mean Mustard — Soviet-style label featuring stern babushka grandmother with rolling pin, surrounded by wheat sheaves and red banners

This Is Not
Cute Mustard.

Old-world, winter-proof, rolling-pin discipline.
Respect the bite.

Warning: May cause emotional growth.

She Didn't Smile.
She Survived.

This recipe survived war, snow, and weak men.

It does not taste sweet.

Sharp. Hot.
Unapologetic.

Not honey.

Not Dijon.

Not your picnic mustard.

This bites back.

Heat Level

"Grandma approves."

What Goes In

No artificial weakness.

If It Has A Pulse,
Put Mustard On It.

Ready To
Earn It?

Weak Acceptable Fearless

Not responsible for hurt feelings. No refunds for crying.